Mark Twain

Mark Twain Quotations

I’ve been collecting quotations for years and figured I’d put my collections online for others to use as they wish. I’m starting with Mark Twain because we’re coming up on the 100th anniversary of his death and he’ll be in the news for a while. Enjoy these quotations, use the comment form to share any Twain quotations you don’t find here.

More on Mark Twain http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_twain.

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
— Mark Twain

If the world ends, I’ll just head on down to Kentucky because they’re always 20 years behind.

— Mark Twain

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
— Mark Twain

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctively native American criminal class except Congress.
— Mark Twain

Familiarity breeds contempt–and children.
— Mark Twain

Principles aren’t of much account, anyway, except at election time.
— Mark Twain

Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething.
— Mark Twain

The man who doesn’t read good books has no advantage over the man who can’t read them.
— Mark Twain

Everything has its limit–iron cannot be educated into gold.
— Mark Twain

There ain’t no way to find out why a snorer can’t hear himself snore.
— Mark Twain

Where prejudice exists it always discolors our thoughts.
— Mark Twain

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; truth isn’t.
— Mark Twain

Wagner’s music is better than it sounds.
— Mark Twain

Temperate temperance is best; intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.
— Mark Twain

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